rivervox

My daughter has gone to sleep away camp for the month. It's been four days and I'm feeling anxious about her. I've seen photos but we haven't had a letter. When it comes, I suspect it will be "Hello Muddah Hello Faddah" in nature.  What surprises me is that I seem to have some kind of process running in the background that turns on at meal times and bed time. Is she eating? Is she sleeping? Is she happy? The thing about having a child is that they really feel like a part of you. First they literally are, then as they nurse and sleep on you, they are like an extra limb. They slowly move away and it hurts a little every time, like stretching a muscle. In this case, my muscle is stretched so much it feels like it's ripping. I feel like I'm not doing my job. I have sent her to a place where I believe she will be safe, with people who care for children. She is having experiences I can't give her and gaining a measure of independence. All good things, right? I miss my baby.

To my young friends, the reason your mother bothers you about your appearance is that you are extension of her. That hair feels like her hair and she can't stand it in her face so how can you?