This is just to say, that we made it through Solstice. Things going well in general, though Violet is having a bad morning. No jolts in over a week. Honey is here and we're halfway through Chanukah. A bit of a mix up with presents (I got the tickets!) but all will be well. Need to finish up work and get packing. It doesn't seem real. I will walk on the beach. Look at the stars. Read, write, do yoga. Breathe.

On the deck at Anawon. It's almost 50 with clear blue skies. We came out Saturday for a long, long weekend. Even got DH to take an extra day. He's out biking. I'm waiting for Violet to take her on a hike or beach walk. This morning I went to get bagels in Orleans for breakfast. Then went to PB for bread, butter and pastry, Seriously, fresh baguette and butter from Normandy are the best things in life.

Last night we saw West Side Story in Ptown. It was exciting to be in a cinema. We were happily alone until two others came along. The movie was wonderful. I actually felt a bit of a thrill in America. It's been a while since I've felt that. We had a rough evening around food. Got dumplings and then went to the Canteen which has some great veggie sandwiches. We sat alone in the tent. It was too cold and windy to walk around. Stormy internal weather as well. The heater in the bedroom was blasting Sat. night and we couldn't sleep. Turns out the battery is low, but we figured it out. She should have a house guide for those things.

Driving out to Orleans this morning I realized that one thing I like about being here is driving. Out on the back roads with the radio on. I think it reminds me of days in New York. There is a freedom on the road. I feel hemmed in in the city. Having a little fantasy that I could just stay here. Here on this porch in the sun on a side road. Wonder what it sounds like in the summer. Cars and children I expect. Music. In the winter with the leaves off the trees you can imagine what it once was. Fine land, near the abundant marshes and the welcoming sea. We drove out to Nauset Light to see a huge orange moon rising. A gibbous I think, but majestic as it rose over the ocean.

Packing up. Another gray day on the Cape. I guess I would feel ill-used if the sun came out.

Yesterday I walked on the beach at Coast Guard with Honey and went to Fort Hill with both girls. We went at 4, and dark came on as we walked through the red maple swamp. A fun outing though! A good way to spend the first day. Unfortunately, there was an issue with Exchange so DH had to work all day. He did get a bike ride in, but we didn't spend any time together. Luke called, which was delightful. He asked a lot of questions and I'm still thinking about the answers.

We had pizza and watched Duck Soup, then Tick Tick Boom. DH and I watched half of Don't Look Up. For some reason, I sneezed all day, especially when I was in the kitchen. I took an antihistamine. It was find when I was outside, in the bedroom and in the shower. I thought it was a sign of COVID but today it's gone and I feel fine. So weird. I was tempted to take a test last night. But I'm not sure what the point would be. If I have it, we all do. The only good thing that might happen is that Violet would have to skip school and we could stay here.

I'm nervous about going back. It seems inevitable that we will be exposed by Sigal at school. We're just playing on the beach while the tsunami crests over our heads. Still we march on. We had a good, relaxing time here. What can we hold onto? What rocks amidst the sand as the clutching tide pulls us into 2022?

We spent 21% of 2021 on the Cape. In 2020 it was 19%. Let's call it 20% of each year. G-d willing it will never happen again until we retire!

I rode out to Cook's Brook this morning. Out on Aspinet and back on N. Sunken Meadow. The water was quiet and lovely. I walked a bit on the beach and meditated briefly. Honey made pancakes and I had to run out to the Superette for syrup. It's cloudy, there are spots of blue sky and the ceiling is higher.

Last night we finished HP, and then watched Landscapers, DISCO, and Ready Room. Wil Wheaton opened up about his past trauma to Mary Wiseman and it was intense. Then I watched a Grantchester and part of The Great, which continues to be entertaining. The news spikes my anxiety, so I'm cutting down on outside input. equilibrium...

Packing up the house, doing laundry, cleaning. One good thing about a hotel room is you don't have to clean it before you leave!

Yesterday we went to Provincetown. It was busy and we had to park up on the hill. DH's ankle was bothering him and it was cold, so we didn't do much. We went to the Holiday Market which was terrific. They had food heaters and some nice crafts. I bought a hair clip for Honey and Violet got an ornament for a friend. A former BHS teacher was there, but I didn't say hello because of teen embarrassment. We got some dumplings, some necessaries and drove back to Eastham. We saw the sunset at Cook's Brook, but it was very windy and cold. Back at the house, we settled into TV and leftovers. I think folks were worn out.

I got to bed early and think I got 8 hours. The weather and the Beatles have been against us, but at least we're on the Cape and not in our condo. And we don't have to go back there for another week. I'm a bit nervous to see what it looks like today. And the cabinets tomorrow. Also anxious about getting Honey home.

BUT the sun is shining, the sea surrounds us and the road stretches out ahead.

Took a long walk on the beach from Linnell Landing to the beginning of the Namskaket Marsh. Then I found a trail and walked back along the marsh to Crosby and then back on the beach to the car. I listened to Levar Burton read the Shirley Jackson story “The Story We Used To Tell”. It was low tide and there were plovers on the sand isles along with the gulls. Cloudy but warm today. Rain is coming.

Last night I started watching Tales from Earthsea which is a Ghibli movie loosely based on the LeGuinn stories. It was entertaining and mysterious. I would like to read those stories again when I get home. By which I mean Brookline.

It has occurred to me that I require a 3 bedroom, 1.5 bath house with dining room, mud room, attached garage, attic, basement, porches and patio. Is that too much to ask? Has this sanctuary cursed me?

It has been one year since we were in NYC to see Beetlejuice. Precious time.